Some Sundays...

Okay, I'll admit, there are some Sundays when I would much rather stay in bed and snuggle with my 2 birds than get up and go to church. When I get to church, though, I'm always glad to be there. However, sometimes serving and participating in ministry can get in the way of worship. I think we often try to do too much at church. The picture of church painted in the New Testament is pretty simple. There weren't special events every other weekend and 10 different ministries operating at once. Sometimes I feel like we're catering to consumerism at church, offering so many different things in order to appeal to the most people. We often forget that while it is possible to do many things, it's impossible to do them all well. We get stretched in so many directions that no one aspect gets our full attention, energy, or effort. On top of that, the 20/80 rule exhausts our core volunteers. I'm willing to be one of the 20% that do 80% of the work, but I will NOT do that at the expense of my family. I work 5 days a week and usually only get 3 hours every night with JBird. Saturdays and Sundays are our family time. Being a wife and mother is my foremost calling, and while serving at church is good, it may not always be the best way for me to honor God. 

It sounds like I hate church. I don't. In fact I love church - gathering with believers and praising God. I am SO thankful for the body of believers we worship with. Lately, though, it's felt like church is slowly taking over my cherished spare time with Jacin & JBird. I sat in a 3 hour staff meeting today. We talked about ministry - exciting stuff, but lots of details. On the way home, I felt so overwhelmed I cried. God STRONGLY confirmed that my primary ministry is now at home and at school. I am to spend my time and energy serving my family, discipling my son, and sharing Jesus' love with my 7th graders. At this point in my life, God has NOT called me to organize, direct, or even participate in 10 different ministries and tons of special events on the weekends. Part of me wonders if I'm being selfish. It's not that I'm unwilling to use my gifts - on the contrary - I'm more than willing to write curriculum, sing, keep childcare, organize small groups, whatever!! But I can't do it all at once with excellence. And I refuse to feel guilty about prioritizing my ministry to my family. If I mess up this motherhood calling, there's no re-do button. I can't go back and fix it if I screw it up. Sometimes saying "Yes" to God requires you to say "No" in other areas.  What's good is not always best, and following Jesus isn't about how many things you do or participate in. 

Note to Self: one woman can't do everything, so don't try. Trust God - only He knows where He wants to use you. Don't let others guilt-trip you. Live simply - less is more! Honor Him with the ministries He's put in front of you.  Now go get the sleeping JBird out of his crib and let him snuggle down with you in the big bed. There's nothing a little birdy lovin can't fix.